Coaching

Private coaching supporting you to make changes and create a life that you love living.

In my role as coach, I provide guidance and encouragement for you to make real, lasting changes in your relationship with yourself, others, and life, and to learn and grow in ways that matter most to you.

I provide support for you to bring greater awareness to the patterns that play out in your experience, to listen deeply to yourself, to step out of your comfort zone, to see things and view yourself from different perspectives, to foster habits and ways of being that serve you, to move toward what you want and to be open to new possibilities.

My approach

I offer a free no-obligation phone or Zoom consultation for you to let me know what you'd like to receive from coaching and for us to discuss whether we might be a good match to work together.

I work with the powerful Voice Dialogue model (parts work), inner child re-parenting, body awareness, mindfulness, the polyvagal theory (nervous system fight-flight-freeze responses), attachment theory/styles, non-violent communication (NVC), the Initiator-Inquirer process (for couples and other close relationships), guided meditation, menstrual cycle and menopause awareness and a wide range of experiential exercises and models that support greater self-awareness, deeper self-connection, learning and growth.

My coaching approach is both inner-process oriented and action-oriented. It is practical and includes homework or homeplay that will help you to practice what you learn and discover in our session(s) and integrate it into your everyday life. I offer guidance which supports your personal empowerment, acknowledging that ultimately YOU are the expert in your experience and that I, or anyone else, cannot know what is best for you.

I receive regular ongoing support and supervision with Ireland-based psychotherapist Alison McGeown and supervision for Voice Dialogue facilitation with East Sussex-based psychotherapist Jayne Deeks. Sessions can be held in person in Hove at Grey Door Therapy or Brighton and Hove Therapy Hub, or online. If you have any further questions on my approach, please do get in touch.

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About Nicola

Relationships coach and Trainer/facilitator

I support people to enjoy wellbeing, confidence and happiness, in kind, healthy relationships, in both personal and professional life.

I’m a relationships coach, trainer and facilitator of 20 years experience. I’m deeply committed to living what I teach, and to bringing my ongoing learning and life experience to my work.

I’ve experienced many of the relationship challenges my clients face and have healed dysfunctional relationship patterns that I had, at times, believed would never change. This enables me to offer solid support and guidance from a place of deep understanding, for my clients to move toward experiencing the relationships they dream of.

As a child growing up in Wales, I had a keen, buzzing curiosity for understanding myself, others and life, as well as I possibly could. So much of the world and ways that people related didn't make sense. I didn't understand why people were so unhappy and fought so much, and why there were so many rules - both spoken and unspoken - that people were expected to follow that meant we couldn't be our honest, authentic selves.

I questioned and challenged the idea that it was "just how life is" and chose to explore and express who I felt I was, rather than accepting others' ideas of who I was told I should be. I looked for ways to connect more deeply with myself and others, and delighted in discovering my own unique ways of being in the world.

In my early twenties I moved to Galway, Ireland, and took a masters degree in community development. I began my professional career supporting the empowerment of local communities, soon realising that community empowerment was impossible without the individuals of those communities becoming personally empowered in their own lives and relationships.

Realising that life is all about relationships, I began offering an assertiveness course. I loved seeing how people's lives transformed when they learned how to listen to themselves and say “no” and “yes” clearly and kindly. Many reported being newly empowered to speak up and handle difficult conversations at work, communicate better with their partner and set healthy boundaries with their children and other family members, feeling freer to be themselves, happier and more at peace.

And the personal challenges I faced in my own relationships led me to seek out training that would equip me to navigate them with more skill and kindness, and to support others to do the same. This includes training with Jan Day, Voice Dialogue training with Transforming Dialogue, A Year of Polyvagal with Deb Dana and Irene Lyon's Nervous System Health Program Smart Body Smart Mind.

The huge shifts I’ve experienced in difficult relationship patterns means my life is now much happier, healthier and more fulfilling than I ever thought possible. I've learned and discovered a great deal since my early thirties, that, if I'd been taught at school, would've made life so much simpler, happier and more peaceful. I have a huge passion for sharing with others what I find most helpful, and a deep wish for us all to experience what we most long for in our relationships with ourselves, with others and with life.

I'm based in Hove, East Sussex.

Some of the themes I work with:

My experience includes supporting clients with:

Authentic Relating & Kind Communication

Improving communication in all relationships, for more harmony and reducing conflict and its impact
Being your true self and being loved and accepted for who you really are

Befriending your whole self

Finding acceptance and compassion for yourself, and loving your whole self, including all parts of you
Meeting loss and grief with self-compassion and self-soothing
Discovering yourself after a big life change such as a break-up or divorce, and creating a new life that you love living

Deepening Connection & Intimacy with Yourself & Others

Deepening your communication and intimacy - for couples
Finding stability and untapped resources within yourself, to help you deal with times of change and uncertainty
Learning practical actions to meet a new romantic partner and nurture the connection in its early stages and beyond as the relationship grows and deepens
Finding forgiveness after a betrayal or conflict, and self-forgiveness
Moving from being confused and conflicted to clear and empowered when making difficult decisions

Everyday Spirituality

Reconnecting with your spirituality after a spiritual crisis and feeling lost, alone and disconnected
Staying connected with the essence of your own being more deeply in everyday life
Expressing the qualities of your spiritual nature such as unconditional love, kindness and forgiveness more fully in your relationship with yourself and others

Healthy Boundaries, Saying No & Assertiveness

Learning how to say No with greater confidence and ease and stop people-pleasing
Negotiating assertively in difficult situations for the best possible outcome
Building confidence to do what you really want to do in life, instead of simply what is expected of you

Self-love, Self-compassion & Self-care

Overcoming self-criticism that is holding you back
Becoming unstuck from an unhappy life situation or relationship and moving toward what you want
Addressing emotional eating and other addictive patterns
Increasing your personal empowerment to deal with challenging relationships and difficult life situations

Understanding Relationship Dynamics

Understanding and changing negative patterns that create disconnection and disharmony in your relationships
Knowing yourself and discovering your deepest wants and needs in your relationships
Difficulties with relationships at work

Frequently asked questions

Do you work with couples or individuals?

I work with both individuals and couples.

As a Relationships Coach, I support people to enjoy wellbeing, confidence and happiness in all the relationships that make up their life experience: their relationships with themselves (the primary relationship which determines the quality of all our other relationships and interactions) their relationships with romantic partner(s), family, friends, work colleagues, customers/clients, and with life itself.

How many coaching sessions will I need?

It depends on what you want to work with, and the kinds of changes you are looking for. A minimum of three sessions is usually recommended to work with a particular issue, however sometimes a single session is all that is needed if there’s something very specific you need support with. Many people find that support in ongoing sessions is most effective for deep, lasting change in their relationships and life. We can discuss what might work best for you to start with in our initial call.

What is the cost?

An hour-long 1-1 session costs £70GBP.
An hour-long couple session costs £90GBP.

Are sessions held online or in person?

Both. I use Zoom or Skype for online sessions and hold in-person sessions in Hove, East Sussex, England, at Grey Door Therapy Clinic and Brighton and Hove Therapy Hub.

Coaching

Book a free consultation or make an enquiry

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Discover workshops

Workshops providing useful, practical information and tools that enable you to make significant changes in your everyday life and relationships.

Find out more

5 Steps to Saying No with Confidence and Ease