Do you want more loving, harmonious and fulfilling relationships? Do you want more understanding of your relationships and how to relate in more healthy ways?
Relationship dynamics are the patterns of behaviour that happen between people in the ways we relate, interact and communicate with each other. Having an awareness and understanding of the dynamics that play out in our relationships puts us in a position of empowerment. We can much more effectively navigate the challenges we face, meet ourselves and others with greater compassion, and experience more love and fulfilment in everyday life.
A range of different dynamics play out in all of our relationships – in our romantic partnerships, between family members, friends, work colleagues, etc. Some dynamics are healthy and feel good to us, whereas others are dysfunctional and feel painful.
Having an awareness and understanding of the dynamics that play out in our relationships puts us in a position of empowerment. It helps us become clear on what is not working for us, so that we can address it, as well as what is working, so we can take time to appreciate it and invite more of it into our lives. We can much more effectively navigate the challenges we face, meet ourselves and others with greater compassion, and experience more love and fulfilment in everyday life.
Relationship dynamics often play out as repeating patterns. For example, you may find yourself having the same kind of argument with your partner over and over again. What you are arguing about (the content) might be different each time, but the dynamic playing out is the same – your partner is criticising and blaming you, and you feel hurt and react defensively. And in the same relationship, you may have other dynamics that are healthy, such as affirming each other’s loveability and goodness, through which there is a true meeting and seeing of each other.
Perhaps the most important and powerful understanding we can have of relationship dynamics is that they are a reflection of the dynamics of our relationship with ourselves. The more we are in love, connection and harmony with ourselves, the more these qualities will be reflected in our relationships with others, and painful patterns in our relationships can alert us to something happening within us, that needs our loving attention.
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An example of a very common dynamic that can happen both within ourselves – between different parts of us – and in our relationship with others, is the drama triangle. In this dynamic, we find ourselves in the position of victim, persecutor or rescuer. Some of us may have a stronger tendency toward one of these positions than the other two, but usually the dynamic involves moving between all three positions. Awareness of how this dynamic can play out in our lives is a first step toward moving into a place of personal empowerment and greater harmony in our relationships.
Attachment theory is another very useful model for understanding some key dynamics of human relationships. Knowing our own attachment style tendencies can be extremely helpful for understanding our feelings and behaviours and navigating our relationships more effectively. It is particularly useful in our romantic relationships, including in relation to the partner(s) we choose and how we relate and communicate with them.
Voice Dialogue can be a very effective way of understanding our dynamics in our relationship with ourselves, others and all aspects of life as we experience it.
Some degree of difficulty in our relationships is inevitable for all of us. Being human is messy and unpredictable! When our relationships are healthy, we understand and accept this, and remain open to ways we can experience more connection, love and harmony.
Different ways to explore each theme
Coaching
Coaching can support you to make real, lasting changes in your relationship with yourself, others and life. Sessions can be held in person or via Skype.
Workshops
Workshops can support you to make real, lasting changes in your relationship with yourself, others and life.
Contact me
Are you not sure where to start? Get in touch to book a consultation.
Workshops for understanding relationship dynamics
Learn to say No clearly & kindly
Do sometimes (or often) you struggle to say NO? Would you love to be more honest and authentic in all your relationships?
Harmonious relationships: Stepping off the drama triangle
Learn how to step out of this common human dynamic, for your personal empowerment and more harmony in your relationships.
Deepening self-intimacy
Explore your own inner world and deepen your connection with yourself in this workshop.
Some of the themes I work with: